What are signs that I am in an unhealthy relationship? If your partner exhibits any of the following traits, this could be an indicator that your situation is not healthy.
- Controlling or manipulative
- Constantly tearing you down instead of building you up
- Openly disrespects others, especially those that are close to them, like their family or friends
- They discourage you from pursuing your dreams and goals
- They make you begin to question your independence, and lead you to believe that you are unable to live without them.
- They put on a façade in front of others leading them to believe that your relationship is doing well, but behind closed doors, they are a completely different person.
- If they are afraid of commitment- relationships are not intended to waste your time. They are a beautiful way that help you determine whether or not you want a future with someone, and if your partner is taking commitment lightly, that might not be the best route to take. You deserve to feel appreciated and loved, and it is important to find someone that will not make you question your standards, but will reaffirm them every step of the way.
HOW CAN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS AFFECT OUR MENTAL HEALTH?
Unhealthy relationships can manifest themselves in our own minds by causing feelings of depression, anxiety, or hopelessness. They can also lead you to question your value, goals, and other relationships in your life, such as with friends and family members. Unhealthy relationships can also make you question how other people see you, which can then affect the way you see yourself. Relationships are meant to be both give and take, not one person constantly taking, and hurting your mental/emotional wellbeing in the process.
HOW DO RELATIONSHIPS INFLUENCE MY PREGNANCY PROCESS?
Your partner is meant to be your biggest supporter during your pregnancy process. While it is definitely possible to continue a pregnancy and parent on your own, if you are going to have someone else in an influential position in your life, such as a significant other, it is important that they are there to support you, love you, and help you pursue what is best for you.
HOW DO I GET OUT OF AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP?
It is important to accept that you deserve better, and working up the courage to take a step in the right direction. But how do we get to this point? Talk to someone. Here at AWPC, we are invested not just in our clients’ pregnancies, but also the health of their relationships.
WHAT SHOULD I DO IF I AM BEING MISTREATED?
If you are in a difficult situation, it always helps to talk to someone trusted about what you are going through. Seeking professional help is also a helpful option for those who are a victim of abuse. Confronting how you feel is incredibly important. When you begin to push your feelings to the backburner, you can begin to lose sight of yourself, or suppress those emotions until you reach a breaking point, resulting in further emotional trauma. Should you choose to pursue professional counseling, we at AWPC are always happy to provide referrals for local counselors who can help you through this season.
IS ABUSE ALWAYS PHYSICAL?
Physical abuse is only one form of abuse. Not all abusive relationships leave visible scars and bruises. Verbal abuse is when your significant other attacks you with their words. This is not to be confused with getting mad once in a blue moon. This is when your partner talks down to you in a way that belittles you as a person, and makes you question your value, not only to them, but to yourself and others. Words are a strong weapon, and when your significant other has shown repeatedly that they don’t know how to control that weapon, it’s time to reevaluate things.
Mental abuse occurs when a significant other is manipulative in their words and/or actions. It doesn’t have to come across as an attack, but rather, emotional abusers often approach this form of terrorization through subtle jabs until the idea is built up in the mind of their partner that they need their abuser in their life. “Narcissist” is not just a derogatory insult used for people who seem to think too highly of themselves. It can also be used to describe an abusive individual who manipulates situations and people for their own gain or satisfaction.
Sexual abuse is yet another form of abuse that is not to be taken lightly. If your significant other is forcing you into actions you are uncomfortable with, it is important to take a stand. You deserve to be respected, and it is important to voice your concerns with a professional who can help you cope with the trauma one experiences after being a victim of sexual abuse. Abuse exists in other forms as well, and if you are curious to learn more, we encourage you to visit: https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/ipv/IPV-factsheet_2020_508.pdf
WHAT DOES A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP LOOK LIKE? THE FOLLOWING ARE TRAITS THAT ARE VITAL IN A GOOD RELATIONSHIP :
- Someone who puts your needs above their own
- Someone who will not put you in situations in which you feel violated, mistreated, or uncomfortable.
- Someone who knows the meaning of the word “no”. If you don’t like a poor behavior of theirs, they will work to change it.
- Full of love and support. This does not mean they blindly follow whatever you say. It means that they encourage you with what is good, and help you reevaluate decisions when they could potentially be bad for you. They are always looking out for you and your wellbeing.
- They remind you that even though they consider you to be a significant part of their life, they recognize that you are your own person with your own dreams, goals, family, and friends outside of them.
If you feel like your relationship is lacking in one or all of these areas, it’s likely time to try and work things out with your partner. If you are being abused or mistreated, it’s time to walk away from the situation.
HOW CAN AWPC HELP ME?
Yes, we are here for pregnancy services, but we are also here to remind you that you are loved. We are able to provide resources for safe housing if you feel that you are in danger. We also offer resources that show what provides a solid foundation for relationships. If you are pregnant, we are here to provide a support system should you choose to parent alone, or if you feel that leaving your significant other would be the best option for you and your well-being.
We want to encourage you that you have the freedom to choose where your relationship goes. If it is unhealthy, we want to help empower you to make the decision that best suits your life. You are valued, and if someone actively works to diminish that sense of worth within you, we want to combat that with truth.